Archive | September, 2012

The Opponents’ Mailbag: Packers

29 Sep

Have y’all seen Canal Street Chronicles’ new look?  It’s pretty impressive.  Well done, SB Nation.

The new Opponents’ Mailbag is up, featuring some Packers fans and their dumbass questions.  Warning: if you’re tired of hearing about Most Righteous King Goodell, don’t hit the link.  I only accepted Commish questions on this, the week of Goodell Bowl.  So if you don’t like the idea, here’s a hot Packers fan.

By the way, Green Bay?  The google search for “hot Packers fans” was miserable.  Do something about that immediately.

The Opponents’ Mailbag: Packers >>

The Third Level of Suck

24 Sep

“Job security, bitches!”

Well, fuck.  That’s it.  I have nothing left.  Spags’s defense might come together – hell, they played admirably through over half the game given the shit they had to contend with, but it inevitably all came unraveled.  I thought we had it in the bag – hell, everyone did.  When the Chiefs responded to a great drive and touchdown with a massive kick in the balls on just one play - for their lone touchdown of the game, mind you – I hope you all felt it coming.  Sure, the lead was still there.  We had the ball.  But you just knew it, right?  In your gut.  In your heart.  In your fucking genitalia.  Goddamn, we are going to lose this fucking game.

But I won’t bore you with a recap, or a bunch of miserable, heart-breaking stats (SaintsWin has that covered anyway), or a breakdown of the absolute worst offensive performance I can remember from a Saints team that held a roster spot for Drew Brees.  Nope.  This isn’t about one game.  It’s about the nightmare season to come.

Read on >>

The Opponents’ Mailbag: Chiefs

22 Sep

This is a Chiefs’ fan.

Each week, the Angry Who Dat answers some e-mail questions from fans of the Saints‘ opposition. Read on for Episode 3, featuring some questions from fans of the Kansas City Chiefs.

***

Paul Sarkezy, Kearney, MO: “Dude, let me tell you, this bounty crap is a shame. It’s just not fair that you have to start the season with an interim head coach, while your defensive coordinator that started all this tours Thailand or whatever. We Chiefs‘ fans feel your pain. We don’t have a head coach or a defensive coordinator, either.”

Zing!

Read on at Canal Street Chronicles >>

 

Let’s Go, Peyton! (clap clap clapclapclap)

16 Sep

This happened today, so it wasn’t all bad.

Fuck yes!  We won time of possession!  And we rushed 27 times! For 163 yards! Now that’s what I’m talking about!  Now if we can just get a win from Denver tomorrow night, we’ll be tied for first!

“Angry Who Dat, we lost today. You know that, right?”

No.  Bullshit.  What kind of drugs are you on?  We held the ball longer than they did.  Plus, 6 yards per carry, bitches!

“No, really.  They scored more points than we did.  They averaged 18 yards per reception, for crying out loud.  That probably had something to do with it.”

Well, sure.  But in the first three quarters we ran the ball 43 percent of the time.  Way better than last week!  YES!

“Don’t forget the pick-6, buddy.  And the two drops on the goal line.  And, you know, Steve Smith.”

Holy shit.  Are you trying to tell me that offensive execution, the ability of the defense to prevent scores, turnovers, and numbers of touchdowns and field goals for each team count more in football than the amount of time you possess the ball or whether you hit an arbitrary measure of balanceness?

Well, I’ll be damned.  So much for that idea.  Back to the drawing board, Who Dats!

Shit.  Now that I’ve gotten my requisite snark out of the way, here’s the thing: it’s a 16-game season.  Big fucking forest, and only two of the trees are burning, and you can’t just forget to see the trees for the forest fire, or something.  Anybody got a hose?  Spags?

Read on >>

Why a Pass/Run Balance Still Matters

15 Sep

Posted by @ReidG75 of SaintsWin

Reid and the Angry Who Dat took a twitter discussion to long-form.  Read AWD’s argument to the contrary, posted earlier today, here.

It’s a simple proposition, really: a relative balance in pass/run attempts is a residue of winning teams, and getting some sticky, winning residue on you is always a smart idea.

Before I continue … Yes, the debate about offensive balance is beaten to death and clichéd and oft-repeated and mostly annoying.  But that doesn’t make it irrelevant.  To dismiss it as such would be to miss the larger point.

Read on >>

Why Balance Is Not Necessarily Necessary

15 Sep

NO! THAT’S MORE THAN 59 PERCENT!

 

Wow.  I posted this on Canal Street Chronicles yesterday.  Buried in a post that was meant to be humorous was this line:

The Panthers were right to abandon the running game, gaining less than a yard per carry on those 12 rushes. You can fix play-calling, especially when you’re facing a team that has trouble stopping the run. I’m not sure you can fix a complete inability to run quite so easily.

Ugh, that was sloppy.  I should have said, “I’m not sure you can so easily fix…”  Anyway, to be fair, I was really just talking trash about the Panthers’ running game.  But I did mean what I said.  They were right to abandon the running game in those circumstances.  A few took exception to that statement (and I’m not talking about the silly troll in the comments, I’m talking about folks on twitter that actually have some idea what they’re talking about).

One of them was Reid G. from SaintsWin, and I proposed a challenge.  Take this to long form, homie! BLOG FIGHT! (His post is here if you somehow missed it.)

Read on >>

The Opponents’ Mailbag: Week 2, Panthers (CSC)

14 Sep

Gratuitous photo of hot “Panthers fan” I found in a google search

 

Episode 2 of my Opponents’ Mailbag series posted this morning on Canal Street Chronicles.  Make the jump below for my answers to some dumb questions from douchebag Panthers fans. 

Big thanks to @SportsCajun for providing perhaps the best Panther fan comment of the week via the SportsJoes podcast.

Canal Street Chronicles >>

Unindicated

10 Sep

“The Redskins! The fucking Redskins!”

Hey, coach, why don’t you get things going? Opening statement is yours.

“There were no indications that this would happen. If you look at the Houston preseason game, there were no indications that this would happen.”

Way to understate the seriousness of the situation, coach. Talk about stating the obvious. I know I didn’t see any indications. Indications weren’t to be had. I wouldn’t have believed an indication if I had seen it. That bullshit I paid good money to sit through yesterday afternoon was fucking unindicatable.

So, if you will, allow me to bitch for a few moments before I try to make some positives out of this fiasco. If you don’t want negativity this morning, skip the next few paragraphs. Because I have some shit I’m angry about.

Read on >>

The Opponent Mailbag: Redskins (CSC)

8 Sep

Check out my weekly contribution to SB Nation / Canal Street Chronicles’ Saints coverage this year: The Opponent Mailbag.  I’ll answer questions from the opposition’s fan base about the upcoming game, our team, and whatever else happens to be on their minds.

“Angry Who Dat, are you trying to tell us that fans of other teams know / give a shit who you are?”

Um, well…

“Excuse me, Angry Who Dat, but why would Redskins fans ask YOU questions?  Don’t they know that you’ll just make fun of them and be a general dick?”

Oh, maybe they -

“Dude, really, this is such obvious bullshit.”

Oh, fuck it.  Here’s the link.

That Crazy Bitch Is Back! -or- Overextending The Metaphor

4 Sep

Best google image result for “crazy saints bitch.”

Hey.  Internet.  How’s it going?  I missed you.

Yeah, so this isn’t “Overanalyzing the Preseason: Episode V.”  It’s not even Episode III.  What shit this preseason’s been.  Yeah, right, I get it, every preseason is shit, but this one, wow.  Isaac might have been the biggest pain in the ass Category 1 storm in the history of utility companies, and all the while all kind of shit has had me occupied at work (that’s like a blog, except I do it 40 hours a week and it makes me money).  Meanwhile, problems abound in Real Life that I won’t trouble you with because, goddamnit, you’re not my therapist, and you come here for football and profanity, and where the hell have I been for the last month?

Well, before you started bitching, I was trying to explain.

Read on >>