Roger Goodell is on the cover of TIME, and everybody’s all pissy about it.
I don’t see what the big deal is. I, for one, think it’s long overdue.Â
Tags: Adolf Hitler, Benito Mussolini, Emperor Hirohito, Joseph Stalin, Kim Jong-Il, Osama Bin Laden, Roger Goodell
Ladies and gentlemen, The Atchafalaya Cookin’ CrawNutria.
I think this captures everything that people are looking for in a Hornets name (judging by the recent flood of “suggestions” from “people” who have “ideas”).
1. Pretentious reference to local thing that nobody outside of South Louisiana can identify without at least 10 minutes on the internet dedicated to the topic
2. Cheesy reference to something everybody outside Louisiana associates with Louisiana and also thinks is terribly cheesy
3. Cheesy reference to aspect of New Orleans culture that everybody recognizes but that everyone in New Orleans is insufferably pretentious about
4. Terrible, terrible, fucking terrible MS Paint logo idea
5. End result is a mythological or conceptual thing that can’t be legitimately represented by a mascot.
Really, this is the one, people. And if you had an idea that you considered original, funny, classy, unique, and/or feasible (especially if you called it in to 870 this morning), it is probably more terrible than the Atchafalaya Cookin’ CrawNutria.
What the fuck was wrong with “Hornets” anyway?
Hey, I’ve been gone a while. I know, I know, it’s just that, y’know, Real Life and all. So what did I miss?
“…”
Oh. Shit. Maybe we should talk about something else. What’s happening besides football?
“Well, Tebow’s gonna sell TiVos now, some very rich British people everyone pretends to care about made a rich fetus everyone’s pretending to care about, and the Pope is twittering now.”
Oh, wow. Football it is then.
I have to be honest. I tried at least three times to write this post. The first three attempts were all realistic and “Wait ’til next year” and “How many loops in a proper belt noose” and stuff. It was pretty dreary. I couldn’t get it to look right, even though there are a lot of things to be positive going into 2013. So I took a step back. I went and looked at what I wrote when we were 0-4 and I was feeling that the end was here.
A miserable read, that was.
Tags: What The Fuck
This person gained well over 2 yards per carry yesterday.
Is that game over yet? What a snooze-fest. Color me bored out of my mind.
Look, it’s great that the defense really stepped up once again. Goal line stands are pretty cool when the game’s on the line, and everything’s all tense, and HOLY SHIT THEY STOPPED THOSE FUCKERS!
I mean, two safeties getting picks in the same game for the first time since 1982 is pretty nice, but neither one really sealed the game or anything – the game was sealed at the first kick.
A win’s more fun when the anticipation is allowed to build over the course of 3 roller-coaster hours. Less so when we know they’re going to win, eventually, all bullshit aside.
Tags: Bears, Chris Ivory, Cowboys, Mark Ingram, Packers, Playoff picture, Seahawks, Tiebreakers, Travaris Cadet, Vikings
RAIDERS FANS SCARY BUT ANGRY WHO DAT ANSWERS THEIR QUESTION ANYWAY
Canal Street Chronicles: Angry Who Dat’s Opponent Mailbag >>
This about sums it up.
That’s right, what we have here is Jason LaCanfora congratulating Mike Freeman and Pete Prisco on “tremendous work” as retweeted by Mike Triplett.
The tremendous work in question? Well, it discusses how some players accept that football is dangerous and keep playing it.
Most of you (excepting only those too old or boring to use twitter) know @FakeJeffDuncan. He should need no introduction. If you don’t know the guy, his twitter handle should explain everything. Fake Jeff Duncan, to be clear, is not a fan of Real Jeff Duncan. 140 characters wasn’t enough to contain his disgust at Duncan’s latest masterpiece, so he has taken to the blogosphere.
Take it away, Fake Jeff.
So we’ve learned from NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell that the New Orleans Saints and Sean Payton are negotiating a new long-term contract extension. So let me get this straight. A full 10 months after the league reportedly rejected Payton’s original deal the exiled head coach and club are finally trying to iron out a new deal.
At this point, Scooter, if Herr Goodell told me the sky was blue I would immediately assume the sky was, indeed, any color but blue. Naturally, you go ahead and simply copy and paste whatever comes out of his office.
Tags: Fake Jeff Duncan, Jeff Darlington, Jeff Duncan, Mickey Loomis, Roger Goodell, Sean Payton
I was honored and priveleged to join Ralph on the Chronic Podcast this week.  He wanted me to come on and make fun of the Falcons a little.
Okay, more than a little.
This post is a little late, so you probably already listened. Unless you don’t usually listen to the podcast, which means you’re a damn fool.Â
Chronic Podcast: Let’s All Point And Laugh At The Falcons >>>
Monday night Pat Yasinskas wrote a wrap-up piece on the Falcons-Saints games with some great quotes from Falcons players. One of the best was quoted last night by Mark Laxman (who tweets as @insidej0b) on Who Dat Dish:
“That’s one team you don’t want to have your first loss to,’’ Atlanta safety Thomas DeCoud said.
A moment before, as reporters stood a few feet away, DeCoud was talking to a few other defensive backs.
“The bandwagon is over,’’ said DeCoud, who then mumbled something about how the crowd at the Georgia Dome next Sunday probably will be filled with fans of the Arizona Cardinals.
Wow. That’s a hilarious indictment of Falcons’ fans by one of their very own players.
I hit the link to check it out for myself. But there was something missing in Yasinskas’s article. Here’s the quote from the article as it now stands:
“That’s one team you don’t want to have your first loss to,” Atlanta safety Thomas DeCoud said.
A moment before, as reporters stood a few feet away, DeCoud was talking to a few other defensive backs.
“The bandwagon is over,” DeCoud said.
Wait a second. Where’s the great Cardinals bit?Â
“Inside Job” says he quoted the text in a simple copy-paste. The Cardinals comment was there originally. But there’s no explanation, no editor’s note, no official correction in the Yasinskas article. It’s just…gone.
So, Pat, did you misattribute the quote? Did you misunderstand what DeCoud said? Or are you just too damn cowardly to allow an inflammatory quote from a Falcons’ player who looks down upon his own fans to stand?
The answer is pretty simple. I’m adding this after the fact (see what I did there, Pat? And I’m not even a journalist), and it implies an explanation, even if the answer sucks as much as you probably imagined:
@TwentyAte28 Attention #FalconNation if you hear somewhere that I was bashing the fans please don’t buy into it…I don’t get down like that…never will
DeCoud tweeted that Sunday night, and the spineless Yasinskas took about 24 hours to take part of the quote down without a word as to why.
DeCoud either said it or he didn’t. Yasinskas either misquoted or he didn’t. The Falcon answered, while the “journalist” remains silent.
You suck, Pat.
Saints Shock NFL With Win Over Falcons.
It’s in the books now, and the New Orleans Saints have shocked the Atlanta Falcons…
…they stopped Atlanta twice in the final few minutes of Sunday’s game to shock the previously unbeaten Falcons…
Shocked? Who the fuck was shocked? What league have you been watching for the last six years? You’re pretty easily shocked if you’re shocked by something that happens for the eleventh time in the last thirteen possible times it could have happened.
Tags: Atlanta Falcons, Matt Ryan, Roddy White, Saints' bitches, Tony Gonzalez
