Tag Archives: Mickey Loomis

Duncan Blows Darlington: the Rage of Fake Jeff

16 Nov

Most of you (excepting only those too old or boring to use twitter) know @FakeJeffDuncan.  He should need no introduction.  If you don’t know the guy, his twitter handle should explain everything.  Fake Jeff Duncan, to be clear, is not a fan of Real Jeff Duncan.  140 characters wasn’t enough to contain his disgust at Duncan’s latest masterpiece, so he has taken to the blogosphere.

Take it away, Fake Jeff.

New Orleans Saints shouldn’t get in a bidding war for Sean Payton

So we’ve learned from NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell that the New Orleans Saints and Sean Payton are negotiating a new long-term contract extension. So let me get this straight. A full 10 months after the league reportedly rejected Payton’s original deal the exiled head coach and club are finally trying to iron out a new deal.

At this point, Scooter, if Herr Goodell told me the sky was blue I would immediately assume the sky was, indeed, any color but blue. Naturally, you go ahead and simply copy and paste whatever comes out of his office.

Read on >>

7/17: The Day Logic Dies

11 Jul


Don’t be this lady. Get ready for the end.

Holy Shit. Five days. Tick, tick, tick. Who ever thought it would come to this? No, you didn’t. Stop it.

Just a few days ago, I’d say you were crazy if you told me that Brees hadn’t responded to an offer made weeks ago. But that’s what Florio’s reporting, and regardless how you feel about him, he’s been pretty spot-on so far this offseason. If that’s true, it’s a big deal. You can’t negotiate further if you don’t first turn down the offer on the table.

Let’s get this out of the way before I start getting shitty: I think Brees will sign a long-term tender by this weekend. My reasoning is simple: he’d be a damn fool not to. Yeah, I’m moving on to the shitty pretty quick today. I’m a little pissed off, honestly.

Read on >>

It’s Almost Over (the arbitrator rules)

3 Jul

The celebration is near.


Well, of course there is. It’s right here.

Read on >>

Bloggers’ Roundtable: The Drew Brees Contract

18 Jun
The Angry Who Dat convened a few Saints’ bloggers to discuss the current state of the Brees’ contract negotiations. Over a 24-hour period The Angry Who Dat, Andrew Juge from the Saints Nation blog, Grandmaster Wang from moosedenied, and @ReidG75 from SaintsWin discussed a variety of topics surrounding Brees. 

Topics ranged from the contentious state of negotiations, Brees’ twitter account, and speculation on what a season without Brees would mean. 

What follows are highlights from a long, rambling email thread.  Trust me, you’ll prefer the Cliff’s Notes version.

Confused? Read the CBA!

31 May

I continue my series of posts on the Drew Brees contract negotiations on Canal Street Chronicles with a look directly at the CBA.  Stop listening to the Legitimates, and see what it says for yourself.  Stay tuned for my next not-on-CSC post, coming very soon – there will be discussion of traitors, and booing, and criminal activity, and links to 20-year-old articles.  Can’t-miss stuff right there.

As is par for the course this offseason, whether we’re discussing the bounty situation (enough with the –gate thing, people) or the Drew Brees contract negotiations, I believe the Saints fan community is taking too much at face value. A few snippets have come out of the Brees/Condon/NFLPA camp via the national media, and no matter if they’re presented as fact or conjecture, they’re not backed up by the actual documents. So, in the interest of self-education, let’s take a look at what the CBA actually says about the franchise tag. Stop trusting the national media, or even your friends in the Saints blogging community, even if they are sometimes right on the mark. You may learn nothing new from this post. However, instead of taking your information from Jason Cole or Pro Football Talk, why not take it straight from the source?

Here’s the CBA. Please, feel free to follow along after the jump.

 Jump to Canal Street Chronicles >>

Well I’ll Be Damned….

25 May

Just yesterday on Canal Street Chronicles I theorized that there’s a whopper of a bargaining chip out there somewhere, probably on the side of the Brees/Condon camp, that’s holding up negotiations. Call it, as some have, a “poison pill.” I said that I didn’t think your typical numbers game was the issue here, for several reasons.

I also admitted that perhaps I was being a little too tin-foily and reading too far into the situation. But, just maybe, I wasn’t too far off.

Read On >>

Bringing the Tin Foil to the Brees Contract Dispute

24 May

Note to Angry Readers: From time to time (maybe once a week) the Angry Who Dat will be coming to you on Canal Street Chronicles. I’ll let you know when you’re jumping off-site, as you see below. TheAngryWhoDat.com isn’t going anywhere, though, so stick around. If you see “Read on >>” for the jump, you’re staying here. Now, to the Drew Brees thing…

Here’s how I like to imagine the last contract negotiation going:

Condon: “$25 million a year. And a part-time sharecropper. Drew wants tomatoes, brah.”

Loomis: “Dude, what? $22 million a year, and we’ll frontload the contract.”

Condon: “Now we’re talking. Let’s discuss admission into the astronaut training program.”

Now I know what you’re saying. What the hell is this guy talking about? It’s foreshadowing. Stay with me.

See, I’m about to bring the tin foil to this contract situation – and I’m bringing it hard. Something weird’s going on here. Something unprecedented. Please, let me explain.

Jump to Canal Street Chronicles >> 

Journalism and Motivation

1 May
Another Saints blogger working diligently to bring you the truth.

I promise: this will be short.  No self-masturbatory indulgence, or whatever the hell that dude at the back table in the Social Club accused me of last week when I wrote more than he could read in one sitting.

First of all, I’m not a conspiracy theory guy.  Really, I’m not.  But people do things that benefit themselves, advance their own careers, make themselves money.  Look no further than Sean Pamphilon for evidence of that inevitable fact of life.

Over the last two weeks or so, your good buddy John Barr at ESPN rose to fame on the back of an imaginary monkey on Mickey Loomis’s back, was ridiculed by the entire nation, and vanished as quickly as he appeared. 

 It was a ridiculous story that he concocted (and that I will not link to in any form), of the Great and Scandalous Loomis hacking phone servers and rewiring communications devices to learn his opponents’ every secret (evil laugh here).  Never mind the silliness of the very idea that a GM would gain something from gameday communications between staff of another club and somehow use it to his – or his coaches’ – benefit.  Never mind the mediocre-at-best record the Saints posted in home games during the period in question.  To be fair, the Saints did drop to 3-13 when he stopped using the devices (allegedly, says the writer who is full of shit and doesn’t want to get sued), but there were some other factors in play, y’know?

I’ll get to the point soon, promise >>

The Gospel of Loomis

29 Mar

The Loomis basks in his own righteous glory.

 Let’s take a look at a couple quotes from the past week or so.

“This season is going to take on an us-versus-the-world mentality. The perception at this point is not positive with us. We’ve worked very hard, I know as players, to gain respect, not only as a good team but as a good group of guys. That perception will go completely out the window now, and I think that’ll be kind of a rallying cry for us.” – Zach Strief

“I wanted to go to a team that, number one, had a chance to win a Super Bowl, had true fans, a great defensive coordinator. Then once the Saints called, I was like, ‘Wow.’ When I took my visit there, I loved it. I knew I was going there. I didn’t need to visit anywhere else. I told my agent that.” – Curtis Lofton

“You think all this crap is gonna be a problem for us? Look at what I’ve done. Free agents aren’t scared to come to New Orleans. Our veterans are using this as motivation. Where is your god now?” – Mickey Loomis

Ok, I made the last one up. But that’s what I choose to believe he’d say to the rest of the league if he could. I don’t know the guy personally (obviously, or I’d be doing something more influential than writing this goofy blog with a readership in the tens), and for all I know he is a devoutly religious man who wouldn’t utter such blasphemy. But that doesn’t matter – I choose to believe that behind those sunglasses exists a badass, foul-mouthed renegade without a care in the world besides winning a Super Bowl.

Read on >>